Firstly, make sure that she is always comfortable— that is your number one priority. Respect is really important in having a consensual, sexual relationship, even if it’s just over the phone. You can try asking her gentle questions like, “Would you like it if I did xxx? (yes/no) What would you like next/instead?” that kind of set the scene and give her a way to enter the conversation on her terms. It might also help to have a conversation one day about the kind of terms that you would like to use with each other— is it a boob, breast, or tit? A wang, a dick, or a penis? Find things that you find sexy and not silly, for whatever parts you have and whatever parts you’ll be mentioning. You might even have different names for things depending on whether they’re in a sexual context or not. Finding terms that you are both okay using can help alleviate some of her apprehension.
Thank you! :)